I am far from home
Except I am not even sure where that is.
I watch those I have grown up with
My heart aches
Nostalgia confuses me, and I reminisce only the good parts
I forget the sadness, the moments when I did not enjoy
I feel a sense of missing out
But it’s funny because I was never a part of their lives to begin with
It’s a lonely season for me
Regret wants to be felt
But I am fighting back
What is there to regret?
I force myself to remember the other moments, the moments of isolation, when the truth was apparent.
I force myself to keep going
And going
And going
I look online and suddenly want things
It’s funny that
I didn’t think about everything I lacked until I looked at a screen.
There is nothing I lack
Only things I can attain
Only potential that is untapped or unrealized
I come as I am.
Far from a home I used to know
A place that serves as a refuge,
Except it has not been that for a while,
And I have been in transit for a while
And I am not far from home at all
Home is within me, and I am home.
I take a deep breath
I make new goals
I try to find acceptance in myself
I remain present
I am living a life that I daydreamed about
I am here now
And in this moment, this is where I reside
In a place far from a former home.
A place that is inviting me to make it its home
Time is on my side
Abundance is on my side.
a reminder